One of my Sabbath rhythms is to pray Proverbs 31 over my wife. It's a great chapter about the kind of woman she aspires to be (and already is, in many ways).
But over the years I've wrestled more and more with the verse about her husband. I'm continually struck by the role he played in their city:
"Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land." - Proverbs 31:23
What does it mean to be that kind of man today?
It sounds like someone who has a reputation for governing, leading, and teaching a local community with wisdom.
The more I read God's Story, grow older, and think about the environment where my kids will one day raise their families, I increasingly believe in the importance of this role, both in my family as well as in my city's gates.
Later Paul told Timothy:
“If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task.” - 1 Timothy 3:1
As I've wrestled through this idea of elder/overseer over the past few years, I don't think I see in scripture the idea that elders are church 501(c)3 board members who serve a 4 year term and meet once a month to discuss the budget. While a Biblical elder could include those things, I think the role is bigger than that.
While scripture gives us lists of elder qualifications, we don't get similar descriptions of what they actually do. For that, in true Biblical fashion, we have to look to stories.
One such story is found in the book of Ruth. Boaz wants to marry Ruth, but there's a legal issue: someone else is in line ahead of him to marry her. So what does Boaz do? In Ruth 4:1–2 we read this:
Now Boaz had gone up to the gate and sat down there. And behold, the redeemer, of whom Boaz had spoken, came by. So Boaz said, “Turn aside, friend; sit down here.” And he turned aside and sat down. And he took ten men of the elders of the city and said, “Sit down here.” So they sat down.
He goes to the city gates and asks 10 city elders to preside over the case in a judicial manor.
I'm not sure what today's "city gates" are exactly, but I do see in these stories that communities recognized certain men as wise and reputable. And these men are available to oversee, govern, and impart wisdom.
I want to be that kind of man: a humble, wise, god-fearing man who can lead, teach, govern, protect, and model the life of Christ in my home and in my city.
So...
- I seek people, experiences, and resources that will equip me for that role.
- I listen to audiobooks and podcasts.
- I attend meetings where we wrestle with scripture.
- I intentionally acquire new skills.
- Try to stay in shape.
- (Usually) get excited when faced with a challenge.
- I seek out older men who are potentially playing that role in our city today in an effort to learn from them.
It's all training for the noble task of becoming a Proverbs 31 husband for my wife, my kids, my future grandkids, and one day, maybe my city.
